exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I AM VODKA MAN
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I made him laugh his dick is mine
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize
