Who did Billy Mays play for?
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
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