I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize