just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
farters have to be the big spoon...
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
