Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
