and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
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