North Korea, Best Korea!
this boner is exhausting
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Randomize
