remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
