How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
