I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Randomize