Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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