its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I'm like, not good at living.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Randomize
