actually, I'm a sock model
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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