Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
