Grow some girl-balls and come out already
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
this will be a night to untag.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
