Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Randomize
