If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I can't put those talents on a resume
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Randomize
