I don't usually arrange sex via text message
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Randomize