a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
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