Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Randomize
