so explain again why im purple
no
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
