Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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