i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Randomize
