Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Randomize
