She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
