he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize