I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Randomize
