I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
