ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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