My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Operation Purity has been aborted
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
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