even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
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