We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
