I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Randomize
