Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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