I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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