We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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