question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Randomize