why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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