Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
