He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Randomize
