Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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