I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
