I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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