I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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