its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
We're too hungover to prance.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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