We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
