That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
