Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
