on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
