either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
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